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Emotionally exhausted Auntie is... pulled in too many directions...
Tuesday, October 14th, 2008 04:36 pmI completely understand how Bilbo Baggins felt at his eleventy first birthday. Right now at this moment, I, too, feel like too little butter scraped across too much toast.
Miss Priss started going to school half a day, though she missed today because... she had stomach pain. A little too close to the upper left quadrant of her abdomen for my comfort. So, I called the doctor's office as soon as they opened at 8 a.m., told them what was going on and didn't even have to ask for an appointment. "8:45," the nurse said. "Even earlier if you can make it."
The doctor palpated her stomach, and said her spleen didn't feel enlarged, but if it happens, it tends to happen pretty fast, so she wanted the Impertinent One to stay home today. And we got bloodwork done. She's getting very good at sticking her arm out and sitting still now.
Then... the Blonde Sister calls. The Flaky Sister's sister-in-law, we'll call her... let me see... Cow Patty? No, no, no, that's too mean and unworthy of Auntie (even though we can't stand each other). The Whiner? No, no, no, again, too mean. Um... how about... Silly Putty? Yeah, that will do just fine. Okay, so Silly Putty has had a huge, whopping heart attack, and is now in CCU (that's Cardiac Care Unit for the uninitiated) in Lubbock. She has no one. One son died of cancer, the other one died from a drug overdose, she's several times divorced, and her mother is elderly and... well, I won't go into it. Silly Putty has no one, so, the Flaky Sister, and her daughter, D, are driving up to Lubbock to help out until Saturday.
This stuns me, because the Flaky Sister doesn't even really like Silly Putty, but... Silly Putty is her sister-in-law, and my sister feels that her husband would have wanted her to take care of Silly Putty. So... she does.
The Blonde Sister, in the meantime, has taken a great deal of time off from work so that our mom isn't alone, and just can't take more off, so she and the Flaky sister were wanting to know if I could come to Houston and stay with her until Saturday.
The hospice people come during the day, but at this point, they don't stay all day long. And they don't stay overnight. Mom needs help in the overnight period, turning Dad, or helping him up.
At this point, my dad has lost enough weight that I could probably pick him up easily (I'm a sturdy, strong little thing, y'all, you'd be surprised). I already have hauled him up off the floor. So I can understand why they want me to come down.
The only problem is... Miss Priss is only going to school half a day. Now, I could ask a friend to pick the Impertinent Daughter up at 11:40, and then pick up the Impossible Son at his usual time and keep them until the Husbandly One gets home from work. The thing is... the sudden stomach pain. And the fact that she's hungry, but... she doesn't feel like eating. She'll say, "I'm so hungry," and I'll ask what she wants, I'll make it for her and then... she only eats three or four bites and then says, "I can't. I just can't." She's not nauseated, she just... can't eat.
I don't want to leave her. And while I'm sure THO could handle things, to a point, just talking to him a few minutes ago, I just don't think it's going to work. And yet, at the same time, I want to go, because I know they need my help, and I don't want them to feel like I did after the Impossible Son was born.
I still haven't worked through my anger about that, and I imagine the Impossible Son will be in college before I can talk about that time without crying.
I feel as if I am being pulled in too many directions. Of course, there is a no-brainer in here. My kids come first. My kids will always come first. My own little family, THO, and my kids, come first.
But... I know Mom needs me.
I suppose there is no need to mention that the stress has given me an excruciating migraine, and I wish, I wish, I wish that THO was good at giving scalp massages. He isn't. Love the man, but really, he has no clue.
If anyone wants me, I'll be curled up in a ball in the closet, with a blanket over my head. Tranquilizers. Big, huge, mondo tranquilizers. I needz them. Nao.
Miss Priss started going to school half a day, though she missed today because... she had stomach pain. A little too close to the upper left quadrant of her abdomen for my comfort. So, I called the doctor's office as soon as they opened at 8 a.m., told them what was going on and didn't even have to ask for an appointment. "8:45," the nurse said. "Even earlier if you can make it."
The doctor palpated her stomach, and said her spleen didn't feel enlarged, but if it happens, it tends to happen pretty fast, so she wanted the Impertinent One to stay home today. And we got bloodwork done. She's getting very good at sticking her arm out and sitting still now.
Then... the Blonde Sister calls. The Flaky Sister's sister-in-law, we'll call her... let me see... Cow Patty? No, no, no, that's too mean and unworthy of Auntie (even though we can't stand each other). The Whiner? No, no, no, again, too mean. Um... how about... Silly Putty? Yeah, that will do just fine. Okay, so Silly Putty has had a huge, whopping heart attack, and is now in CCU (that's Cardiac Care Unit for the uninitiated) in Lubbock. She has no one. One son died of cancer, the other one died from a drug overdose, she's several times divorced, and her mother is elderly and... well, I won't go into it. Silly Putty has no one, so, the Flaky Sister, and her daughter, D, are driving up to Lubbock to help out until Saturday.
This stuns me, because the Flaky Sister doesn't even really like Silly Putty, but... Silly Putty is her sister-in-law, and my sister feels that her husband would have wanted her to take care of Silly Putty. So... she does.
The Blonde Sister, in the meantime, has taken a great deal of time off from work so that our mom isn't alone, and just can't take more off, so she and the Flaky sister were wanting to know if I could come to Houston and stay with her until Saturday.
The hospice people come during the day, but at this point, they don't stay all day long. And they don't stay overnight. Mom needs help in the overnight period, turning Dad, or helping him up.
At this point, my dad has lost enough weight that I could probably pick him up easily (I'm a sturdy, strong little thing, y'all, you'd be surprised). I already have hauled him up off the floor. So I can understand why they want me to come down.
The only problem is... Miss Priss is only going to school half a day. Now, I could ask a friend to pick the Impertinent Daughter up at 11:40, and then pick up the Impossible Son at his usual time and keep them until the Husbandly One gets home from work. The thing is... the sudden stomach pain. And the fact that she's hungry, but... she doesn't feel like eating. She'll say, "I'm so hungry," and I'll ask what she wants, I'll make it for her and then... she only eats three or four bites and then says, "I can't. I just can't." She's not nauseated, she just... can't eat.
I don't want to leave her. And while I'm sure THO could handle things, to a point, just talking to him a few minutes ago, I just don't think it's going to work. And yet, at the same time, I want to go, because I know they need my help, and I don't want them to feel like I did after the Impossible Son was born.
I still haven't worked through my anger about that, and I imagine the Impossible Son will be in college before I can talk about that time without crying.
I feel as if I am being pulled in too many directions. Of course, there is a no-brainer in here. My kids come first. My kids will always come first. My own little family, THO, and my kids, come first.
But... I know Mom needs me.
I suppose there is no need to mention that the stress has given me an excruciating migraine, and I wish, I wish, I wish that THO was good at giving scalp massages. He isn't. Love the man, but really, he has no clue.
If anyone wants me, I'll be curled up in a ball in the closet, with a blanket over my head. Tranquilizers. Big, huge, mondo tranquilizers. I needz them. Nao.
