auntbijou: (Kirk duh what??)
Okay, so... today was the usual trip the library so the kids could go to Animanga Club, and I could write. After I threw the Impossible Son in the shower (this is becoming a regular occurence, it seems, as the Boy Who Lived For Any Excuse To Get Wet has developed an aversion to showers), I went to get my stuff together. It was going along swimmingly, even tossing the Impossible Son back in because he "forgot" to wash his hair (HA!! A likely story!), until I was checking to make sure all three USB flash drives were in their pocket.

There were only two. And the one with the story I've been working on most lately was... gone.

I dumped everything out of the laptop bag and searched it. Nope.

I dumped out my purse, every pocket. Nope.

Okay, I thought. I took it out to work on the story a bit, so I must have left it on my desk. So, I looked.

Nope.

Trying not to hyperventilate at this point, I rushed out into the kitchen to start checking drawers, etc, and the Impertinent One asked me what was wrong. I told her and she helpfully lifted stuff to look under, checked the floor, and made good suggestions of where to look, considering that she knows how my mind works better than I do sometimes. Which is a scary, scary thing, my friends.

Anyhow, no dice here. I had a vague hope it might have fallen out in the car, but really, what I was leaning toward was the horrifying thought that... I might have dropped it... at the library.

*weeps*

We left for the library, and I held out hope that some excessively responsible person might have turned it in at the desk. Heh. What I really wanted to do was wail, weep, and, you know, be generally over-dramatic. I think I'm allowed, considering I was in a grumpy, cranky mood most of the weekend thanks to sleep deprivation brought on by the Impossible Son's inability to sleep when freaked out.

Don't EVEN get me started on that one.

Anyhow, we got to the library, and after the kids took off for Animanga Club, I went to the desk and asked if anyone had turned in a flash drive.

Someone had!

And it looked almost, but not quite, like mine. However, the librarians seem to all know now that I'm a writer and I'm working on something, so... she told me to take it anyway and see if my files were on it.

Fine. So I did, hoping I wasn't going to find some high school (or college) student's illicit porn stash.

Seriously, have you seen the porn high school and college age kids look at? It's sad. Really, really sad. They have no clue, really. They just don't. I don't want to look at their sad, sad porn stash, especially the version of porn that would be found in this extremely Baptist area.

*sigh*

So, anyway, I set my crappy laptop up and noticed schmutz all over the keyboard because somebody (looks accusingly at Impossible Son) was eating crackers (I'm generously hoping it was crackers) while watching Skyrim videos on YouTube. So, I opened this inside pocket that I keep a microfiber cloth, and nothing else, in. It's black, and when I shook it out... guess what fell out of it?

Yes! It was my flash drive!!

Y'all have no idea how hard it was to not do a whooping Happy Dance right there in the middle of the library!! Imminent Mental Breakdown AVERTED!!! YAY!!!!

It was awesome, and I was a very happy woman, and I'm sure the Husbandly One was very happy, too, as this means no copiously weeping Auntie who needs to be plied with copious amounts of chocolate heretofore unheard of, amounts that would put an entire platoon of female Marines in a coma for at least six months.

That's a lot of chocolate.

I have a lot of admiration for Marines, by the way. Just sayin'.

Anyhow, after I finish this post, I'm going to back up my novel... er... I mean... story on the desktop, and on the other extra drive. Just in case. Because, you know, stuff happens.

*sigh*
auntbijou: (Default)
So, what has Auntie been up to lately?

Coping, mostly.

The Impertinent Daughter has recovered from her concussion and is back playing soccer. In fact, her final game is next week.

The Impossible Son is also playing soccer, and is doing well. School-wise, however, math continues to be his Achilles heel, and I have gotten to the point of throwing up my hands. Seriously, his math problems are not going to improve without outside intervention, because he is being confused between what the school is trying to teach him (and I'm using the word "teach" very lightly here) and what we're trying to teach him. Getting his teacher to send home homework has been like pulling hen's teeth. It's frustrating and excruciating watching him try to do what little gets sent home.

He's making A's and B's in all his other subjects. He's got a really high grade in science! But he's making D's and F's in math.

*head-desk*

And then there's my mom.

Okay, so... Mom is in the beginning stages of Alzheimer's. Yeah, I didn't see that one coming at all. But then, we know almost nothing about her mother's family, because she was raised by her father's family, and they couldn't stand her mother's family. So, for all we know, there are people in her mom's family who had Alzheimer's. People in her dad's family tended to be as sharp as a tack up until the day they died. Some of them had strokes, but even paralyzed and unable to talk, their minds were still sharp and clear.

Mom is getting vague and dithery, and forgets what she's said half the time. Her short term memory is going. I already knew that. This, though... yeah, really caught me off guard. It's really difficult to accept that this bright, intelligent, sassy woman is going to... fade away.

Okay, I can't write about that any more.

Anyhow, she gave us a scare earlier this week. Got up and didn't feel right, went to call the Flaky Sister, and by the time my sister got to her, Mom couldn't talk and was glassy eyed. Flaky called 911 after getting her back in the bed, and she was rushed to the hospital with a suspected stroke.

After some tests, however, they determined she had a Transient Ischemic Attack, also known as a T.I.A. or mini-stroke. They gave her some medication and within the hour, she was back to her normal self. Or, as normal as she gets these days. They kept her, though, because she needed to be checked over, and decided to go ahead and run some tests she's been needing, but been avoiding (because she hates hospitals). She should be coming home today, though.

I've been staying in contact with the Blonde Sister through all this, because we decided after an event earlier this month that the Flaky Sister is simply not allowed to call me and "let Auntie know" what's going on with Mom. Why? Because the Flaky Sister is simply incapable of telling me, "Mom has bronchitis and they put her on antibiotics, oh, and when they did a chest x-ray, they figured out she has very light emphysema."

No, it's more like, "Mom's been feeling pretty bad, she's been coughing so hard she shakes and so we took her to the doctor and after an x-ray, they found spots on her lungs, and she now has emphysema, so her smoking when we were kids is coming back to bite her in the ass, and the doctor wants to put her on a bronchodilator, but I said no because it will make her heart work to hard, and she'll freak out, and we won't have her with us much longer, so you need to start accepting that now."

O_o

The Blonde Sister's version? "Mom's been coughing, so we got her in to see the doctor. She has bronchitis, and while he was listening to her chest, he heard some extra wheezing, so he sent her for x-rays. The x-ray came back clear, but there are signs of mild emphysema. However, two days of antibiotics and the wheezing has cleared, so it's not affecting her too badly. Funny thing is, when she saw the doctor last week about the cough, the doctor wanted her to take Mucinex to loosen the phlegm, but for some reason, she heard it as "Benadryl." And so she was taking that, but not only that, she'd forget she'd taken it, and would take more, so that's why she was all woozy and dizzy and sleepy all the time. I've hidden the Benadryl so she can't take it any more. Other than that, she's fine!"

Yeah, I'm not liking Flaky Sister so much lately. If she doesn't watch it, I'm going to give her a good whack upside the head with a Clue by Four.

*sigh*

And I am soooooo not looking forward to next week. The Impossible Son will be taking the S.T.A.A.R. tests, which have taken place of the TAKS testing that has been the bane of our existence over the last few years. He'll probably do just fine in science and reading, but math?

*groans*

It's hard not to feel like I'm failing him in this. It's hard seeing him struggle like I struggled. And it's hard to feel helpless. Dammit.
auntbijou: (Golden-eyed Weasley)


You know, after watching this... I feel better...

LIFE. It Happens.

Thursday, February 2nd, 2012 11:44 am
auntbijou: made by <lj comm=lvlwings_icons> (Delicious Hot Schmoes!)
Can I just... step off the roller coaster for a few minutes? Kinda feeling dizzy... just a bit.

Let's see, we're having to replace the central air/central heating unit in our house because (1) it has reached the age where there are no spare parts available any longer and (2) even if there were spare parts available, it wouldn't be safe to fix.

*sigh*

Yeah, that was fun. The guy who came to repair it works for the company who installed it in the first place some twenty years ago, and after first telling me what needed fixing and how much it would cost, then telling me the parts that needed fixing needed to be replaced, then telling me they don't make those parts any more, I got to deal with the blustering, Good Ol' Boy owner of said company. Mr. Good Ol' Boy took one look at me and decided that I was the type that could be easily manipulated into what he wanted me to do, and proceeded to try to intimidate me into agreeing with him that his company should be the ones to do the work.

Y'all know that went over like a lead balloon, right?

Funny how Mr. Blow Hard and his tech went all through the closet where the CA/CH unit is housed, with Mr. Blow Hard taking measurements and loudly telling his tech that they'd have to rip out the wall, and probably part of the floor to put in a new coil, and he would recommend a contractor to rebuild the wall after they were done replacing the unit, blah, blah, blah, and it never occurred to him that I was texting the Husbandly One basically a blow by blow account of what was going on while I sat quietly at the kitchen table with the laptop. Mostly, Mr. Blow Hard shouted out a series of arcane numbers that I'm guessing were supposed to be measurements of some kind, or maybe it was just supposed to impress me with how technical he was...

When he finally "presented" me with his "findings," I said politely, "Well, I'll discuss this with my husband, and we'll let you know what we decide."

He frowned, then smiled indulgently and looked at his tech, nodding as he said, "Oh, right. You'll discuss this with your husband." He snickered. "You mean, you'll ask him what to do and then do what he tells you."

Yeah, that pretty much made me see red, but I just raised an eyebrow and said, "No, I mean I'll discuss it with my husband. We're partners. Neither one of us makes big money decisions on our own. We talk it out, go over the pros and cons, and go from there. Sometimes he has the final say, sometimes I have the final say, but either way, it gets discussed, we do research, and decide how big a hit our budget can take, because it affects both of us. So when I say we'll discuss it and let you know, that's precisely what I mean. You have a problem with that?"

"Well, if you go with us, you won't have to pay the service fee for this visit," Mr. Blow Hard said, still trying to work the intimidation factor. "But if you go with someone else, I'll have to send you a bill for $85."

"That's fine," I said with a sweet smile. "We'll let you know."

"You should decide soon, because we might be booked up," he said as he headed for the door.

"We'll take that chance," I said firmly. "Bye now."

Yeah, that was fun.

We called a couple of companies, but decided on one recommended to us by the Tall Blonde. What settled it was (1) he got back to us and (2) he didn't just look at the main unit. He also went up into the attic to check the ducts and connections, and went under the house to check the coil and the drains. He was very patient with my questions, and also cleared up a mystery that's been driving us crazy for some time now.

Every time the A/C or the heat came on, I'd smell this... faint burning odor that made the back of my throat burn, and would sometimes set my asthma off. We had the unit checked several times because of this, but there was never anything we could find to explain it.

Then Mr. A/C guy takes a look at the duct work and peers up at the top of our unit and goes, "Huh."

Yeah, that's not a good sound, either.

Seems that when Mr. Blow Hard's company installed the unit, they used a type of duct work that has since been banned in our country because it's... well, basically a piece of crap. And when all the new ductwork was installed, they left this original duct work in place where the unit connects to it all. Basically, what happens to the crap duct is that it dries out and starts cracking, then dry rots and gets blown about in the system. That's what I've been smelling every time the unit comes on.

Mr. A/C said, "What I don't understand is why they left it there. Because even if the new duct wouldn't fit, there's a way to work around it and adapt it, so... why leave the old stuff? It's not safe!"

Well, judging by the crap unit Mr. Blow Hard wanted us to buy, I'd say it was done to cut corners. After all, how many homeowners actually look up into their attic to see what they've got up there? And how many of those that do would know what to look for or what they're even looking at?

We're fortunate that the weather has been mild, though the first three or four nights after we lost our heat were tough, because it got down in the thirties. Thank goodness for lots of blankets!! This house holds on to the cold like you wouldn't believe, and I've had to open the windows during the day just so I can feel my fingers!!

The Impertinent Daughter's team survived a three day soccer tournament over last weekend, and so did we! Again, in San Marcos at the fields where the Impossible Son and I froze our katooshies off. And, yes, it was cold, but not as cold as last year! Friday night, they were in first place, but by Saturday afternoon, because of the bizarre point system the folks who were running the tournament were using, the JV found themselves playing for third.

I'm still not sure where we placed, because every person I've asked have said something different. Personally, I think they placed pi.

Hey, it makes about as much sense as that point system!!

And the Impossible Son has started soccer practice for the rec league this week, which is going to be frustrating, I can tell already. Why? Because once again, there weren't enough coaches for the record FIVE U12 teams that were formed this season, so they basically started grabbing any warm body. And one of the warm bodies is the woman who is coaching my son's team.

I have nothing against her. She's a good person, I've known her since the Impertinent Daughter started playing soccer, and now her daughter and mine are playing JV for the high school. It's cool. However... she's never coached soccer before in her life and has no idea where to start. The good news is, she knows this, and has enlisted the help of several girls on the high school team, as well as any parents who have any sort of know how, or is willing to help out. This can work, I've seen it work before.

I've also seen it go to hell in a handbasket.

So... I'm hoping and keeping my fingers crossed that things will go well. However, the Husbandly One and I have decided this will be Mr. Impossible's last season playing here. If he plays rec league next fall, it will be in San Marcos.

And that is the State of Auntie so far. Woo.
auntbijou: (Default)
Wow, has this year flown by or what?

It's been pretty cool having the Husbandly One home, and we've gotten a lot done over his vacation. We've rearranged the living room, and bought a shelving unit to go around the television that makes us feel more like grownups and less like college students making do with whatever they can find in garage sales and on curbs. Heh. What's nice about it is we've finally managed to corral the hordes of books, dvds, and games that seemed to be continually scattered around the living room with no set place to keep them, and what we did have was inadequate in the extreme.

It was also a good excuse to purge those movies and games nobody watches or plays.

Now if we can just figure out how to arrange the couches so that we can watch tv/play games without getting cricks in our necks, or cutting off the ability to walk straight from the front door to the kitchen, something of vital importance when one's arms are full of groceries. Normally, when we have a movie we want to watch, we just pull the big couch around and pile up on it and push it back to the wall when the movie is over. But sometimes, that's a pain in the neck.

We've also tossed out/gotten rid of things in the kitchens that were cluttering up the counters, and I did a major cleanout/reorganization of the cabinets last night. That was both awesome and terrifying. Awesome, because it felt good to see those shelves neatened up and with so much more room on them because of the stuff I threw out. Terrifying, because we had stuff in there from when we were first married, I kid you not! In fact, some of it was older than our marriage, stuff from my great-aunt's house that somehow just kept getting shoved in boxes and moved with us over the years. I mean, seriously, I found a bottle of Karo syrup that had to be nearly thirty years old!! We never use Karo syrup!! And I found the source of the odd little moths we keep finding fluttering around the house. It was in a canister of ancient anise seeds my great aunt must have bought years ago that was more caterpillar husks than it was seeds!! There was also a jar of rancid ground nutmeg that had ... fermented and smelled... eurgh!!! I mean, why was I keeping this stuff? WHY??

I think the last time I was that horrified, I was cleaning out the cabinets in my great aunt's house and found two cases full of vials of sheep's placenta that my great aunt had apparently been using to keep her skin soft and wrinkle free. One case had been half used, but she had economically put the empty vials back in place. I'd been finding those odd little glass vials all over the place and had been greatly mystified by them up until that point. YUCK!! I'd opened one and it smelled horrible, and I thought, well, that explains why she smelled the way she did.

*shudder*

So, it was wonderful to get rid of all of the out-dated stuff, the inexplicable stuff, and the just plain gross stuff.

Still have some stuff left to do, but I think we can tackle most of that on the weekends coming up. Definitely need to clear off the disaster area that is my computer desk. It's become it's own gravitational anomaly, I swear. Miss Impossible puts all her artwork on my desk, both kids put important papers there, the Husbandly One deposits things there, and of course, so do I, and right now, it's a jumbled mess. It's like a hoarder's house... just on a desk. Empty picture frames, drawings, my sketchbook, hand lotion, lens filters, various articles of clothing, packages, papers, papers, photos, more papers, drawings, pencils, pens, more papers, a POS camera, bottles, earrings, even more papers, boxes, books, more books, a few dvds, hats, even more books... I ought to take a panoramic shot of my desk just so y'all can see.

On second thought, I might be too embarrassed for y'all to see my desk.

Oh, what the hell... here...



Sad, isn't it?

*sigh*

I'm sure the mess is contributing to my writing issues. Yes, I'm still having writing issues. And let me tell you, it sucks. It sucks big time. I mean, I'm writing, I am, just... not anything I can post, really. My head is still crammed full of ideas that are literally just... screaming to get out. And... I just can't. I'm blocked, and it's frustrating. It's been, what, two years now?

And as I've mentioned before, I know what one of the principal causes is (not my desk), and I'm still having trouble moving beyond it. Because the doubts that were seeded have just... overgrown. I guess it's time for a huge mental weeding or something. I know I can write, and I know I'm pretty damn good at it. I even know what I'm good at writing, and you know what? The world has already had one Erma Bombeck, it doesn't need another, and I'm not her, anyway, so... no, I won't be writing that. I have my blog for humor writing, and that's just fine with me.

I mean, come on, I'm even having writer's block where my goddamned blog is concerned, let's not make it worse, all right?

So... mental weeding, and... mental floss, whatever it takes. But dammit, I need to write because it hurts not to!!

So... if I'm going to have any sort of list resembling a vague outline of New Year's Resolutions, this is what it would look like:

1.) Clean off toxic waste dump disaster area known as "desk" and create an art dump for the daughter.

2.) Write, dammit.

3.) Write more, dammit.

4.) Write and get paid for it, dammit!!!

There. I feel better now!
auntbijou: (Voldie Santa)
... at least they didn't wait until we'd gone to sleep to wake us up all over again.

Still, do you have any idea how terrifying it is to be bent over, digging in a drawer to look for those gift bags from last Christmas because nobody can remember where the stockings are, and feel a hard, knobby, bony finger poke you in the side while a voice that sounds like a chain smoking six year old says, "Santa's running late, we got hung up in Poughkeepsie, and then there was a block party going on in Tulsa with search lights... Santa's way behind schedule, and you've got balls to blow up, here's the pump!"

I thought my heart was going to jump out of my mouth!!

I think the only reason that elf isn't dead, dead, dead is because (1) no gifts for the kids EVER, and (2) the Husbandly One wouldn't let me clock him with the lamp. He really likes that lamp. THO, that is.

So... yeah, it's 2:21 a.m., and we're done putting out the presents under the little artificial tree THO and I had the first year we were married. Yes, we still have it, and it looks so cute and completely dwarfed by presents! And I'm sure in the morning, I'll feel more charitable toward the elves, but right now? Not so much.

It was easier when the kids were smaller. Santa did the bulk of the present lay-out, and we just filled out the corners with the presents we'd gotten them. But since the kids have gotten older, it seems Santa is more and more pressed for time.

I'm beginning to wonder, though.

Anyhow, Happy Holidays to all my friends! Hopefully, you're getting more sleep than I am!!
auntbijou: made by <lj comm=lvlwings_icons> (Delicious Hot Schmoes!)
I want to thank everyone for wishing the Husbandly One and I a happy anniversary! And I wish to thank [profile] kathrynthegr8 for the snowman cookie!! Hee!!

The kids and THO are on Christmas break, which means we've been busy, busy, busy pretty much since Saturday! We've mostly finished up Christmas shopping (most of our shopping for the kids was done online) and have bought and assembled a new shelving unit for the living room that will help corral the DVD's and games that were threatening to take over the entire house. Not to mention make us feel a little bit more like grownups and not so much like college students only pretending to be grownups!

Now we just need to replace the aging, wheezing, nearly dying refrigerator, and we'll be good!

That and catch up on sleep.

I'm enjoying having THO home, and it's going to be difficult when he goes back to work. Of course, it's throwing me off my schedule, but you know what? I don't mind it one bit. Because I really like having him around. It's like having my own personal man-candy wandering around the house... wait a minute... he is my own personal man-candy...

*dies laughing*

Okay, now y'all know exactly where my mind is, don't you?

We made the decision not to try to drive in to Houston on Christmas day this year. As much as I love my mom and would like to see my family, the truth is we've gotten used to having our own tradition of watching the kids open their presents and having a sort of lazy day at home, thanks to freezes and weather that made driving not so great an option. And you know, we're always so sleep deprived on Christmas day, thanks to Santa's elves waking us up at ungodly hours of the night to tell us Santa hit a whiteout in Omaha, or NORAD decided to scramble fighters because they thought Santa's sleigh was a bogey coming in to bomb New York and thus threw him off his schedule. So the elves wake us up, because Santa's dropping the presents off and WE have to set them up, because he has to hit New Mexico before 3:30 a.m. or he'll be late... yeah, I hate that.

Seems like that's been happening more and more often, lately.

Those elves have damn hard, knobby fingers, too. And they leave wet spots in the carpet from the melting snow. Damn it.

Anyhow, we're pretty sleep deprived, between that and the kids getting us up way before we're ready to get up, and making the three hour drive into Houston, staying for two or three, then the three hour drive back just... doesn't look so attractive, know what I mean?

We'll go sometime next week. I hope.

*sigh*

In the meantime, we have our own thing, and... I'm pretty darn okay with it. Just so long as we get the tree up between now and Christmas!

Don't. Even. Ask.

So, today we have a bit more shopping to do, and then we're done! And I need to do a bit of wrapping, and figure out what to get the Tall Blonde as thanks for taking me out for a girl's afternoon out and getting my hair cut as my Christmas present from HER, and... man, I am so stumped!!

Chocolate. Can't go wrong with chocolate, right? Lots and lots.

I'll figure it out. Hopefully sometime BEFORE Christmas. Which is... in two days.

*head-desk*

Okay, time for me to get up and get busy! Happy Holidays to you all if I don't get to post again!
auntbijou: Thank you, Karadin! (Gackt eats!!)
So... had a parent-teacher conference with the Impossible Son's primary teacher today. It was interesting, and encouraging.

It was only supposed to be for 15 minutes, but... we ended up talking for 45! We talked about the Impossible Son's math problems at length, and I found that he's been rushing through his math assignments so he can read a book afterwards. While she's pleased to see him reading, she's not so pleased that he's rushing through his math, getting problems wrong, and not asking for help. He says nothing to her. Just finishes as quickly as possible and hands in it, then grabs his book and disappears into it.

*sigh*

Shades of his mother. Meaning me. Which means I know exactly what he's doing.

So, I told her, explaining yet again about the lack of trust in his teachers, and said, "It's not you personally. This started in second grade, with Mrs. Oblivious Teacher, who is now teaching fifth grade." I filled her in on what he had gone through, trotted out several of the math "explanations" she had given me, and followed up with what he had gotten in third and fourth grade, including the outside issues that were causing problems for him.

"Was he as lost as he seems to be now last year, too?" Mrs. S. asked me.

"Oh, yes," I replied. "I had Mrs. H. send home math homework, worksheets, whatever it took, to tutor him through what was stumping him."

We went over what I've found so far that stumps him, showed her what he was doing and what I had done to correct it, and finished with, "I can't help him if I don't know what's going wrong, so please, please, please send home worksheets!"

About this time, a mouse made its presence known.

Not long after that, a second larger mouse made its presence known.

We spent the rest of our time with our feet up off the floor, keeping an eye out for the mice, and talking about the Impossible Son and what we could do to help him.

Somewhere in there, I found myself volunteering to tutor three of her students who are having difficulty with reading comprehension. They read beautifully, but have no memory whatsoever of what they've read. "Apparently, this is a skill they didn't learn back in second grade," she said grimly. "Nor have they been tested or had any sort of intervention recommended, so far as I can find out. And the parents are... not responding to any of my notes."

Oh, goody.

So... this should be fun. I'll start out twice a week, and depending on how things go, I may end up doing it more often, but we'll see. I figure getting them to break the stories down into smaller parts and asking them to tell me what they remember is a good place to start, and I'll expand from there.

The other advantage is that this gets me into the Impossible Son's classroom twice a week, so I can see what's going on and unobtrusively observe him in class.

Lastly, I also need to talk to his Language Arts teacher about why he's making a 75 in a class he normally makes 90's to 100's in. I mean, seriously, this is a kid who is reading at a 7th grade level! I mean, I have my suspicions, but... I'll wait until I talk to the teacher.

*sigh*

Tis a puzzlement!!
auntbijou: (Default)
So... it's been awhile, hasn't it?

Part of that's been because we had the Stomach Virus from Hell, which was possibly a norovirus. Well, the Husbandly One got it on a Wednesday night, threw up and had... um... well, let's just say he drove the porcelain bus, too. Yay. He had me worried to the point of hovering.

I don't hover. Unless someone is really sick.

He got better Thursday afternoon, which was a good thing, because that's the day the school didn't call me when the Impossible Son had been attacked at school.

*sigh*

By Friday, I had a meeting with the principal, informing her in no uncertain terms that she would be seeing both myself and the Husbandly One for a meeting, it was not going to be postponed to a more convenient time because as far as we were concerned, since she and her staff dropped the ball, her convenience was irrelevant to the situation.

I will say this about the Impossible Son's principal. Confronting her is like bashing yourself into a brick wall surrounded by fluffy pink blondeness. Seriously. First, she tried to blame the lack of calling on the counselor. "I told her to do it immediately," Mrs. K. said. "She knew she was supposed to inform you first thing!"

"Except she was in the office with you, because according to your own words, the student was out of control."

"Well, yes, but she should have called you the minute she left my office, and I reprimanded her for it, telling her that her priority is always to inform the parents..."

"Mrs. L. has always called me when there is a problem," I said firmly. "That has never been a problem for us before."

Yeah, that kind of threw her.

And... she tried to turn the Impossible Son's esteem issues back on us. Ohhhh, don't even go there! Don't... even.

We announced our intention to transfer Mr. Impossible, and THO tried to couch it diplomatically, saying that sometimes, just changing an environment can be good (he's had personal experience with that), and of course, she tried to discourage us because they really, really don't want to lose the Impossible Son from that particular school, which is the "flagship" of the district.

*insert eyeroll here*

And finding out what measures they were taking, in the meantime, to protect our son was like... pulling hen's teeth. She kept citing privacy laws to us and I finally snapped and said, "Look, I just want to know if my son is going to be safe! I want to know what guarantee there is that this won't happen again. I want to know what you are doing to make sure he's safe! Are you moving this kid to another class? Are you separating him out and putting him in in-school suspension? Are you sending him to the alternate school? Are you fitting him with a shock collar? What??"

I mean, she wouldn't even tell me if this kid was bigger than Mr. Impossible!!

I found out later through a friend who works at Mr. Impossible's school that Lug has a "shadow." A teacher who is assigned specifically to him who is with him at all times, and that he isn't allowed to come into contact with the other children.

It was a most unsatisfactory meeting on all sides.

So, THO and I made an appointment to talk to the principal of the school across the street from our backyard. She was pleasant and calm, asking for our son's name and taking notes when we told her why we were there and wanted to transfer him. Then she dropped the bomb.

It seems that the fifth grade class in our district is the largest ever, and the fifth grade classes at all four elementary schools in our town are literally jam-packed to the gills. In fact, the class at the Impossible Son's school is the largest in the district, to the point that they had to hire a fifth teacher just to handle the overload.

I already knew this. It started in second grade, when they had to hire a fifth teacher (there are normally four teachers at each grade level at his school) and let her go at the end of the year, then hired a fifth 3rd grade teacher the next year... and let her go, and so on and so forth. I just didn't realize it was district wide.

Anyhow, the principal, Mrs. O. told us she would give us a call after reviewing the situation with the fifth grade teachers at her school, and as soon as there was an opening.

That was Friday. That night, the Impossible Son got the stomach bug, and threw up continuously for several hours. He wanted his Papa with him, so THO stayed up with him while I went to grab some sleep, only to be shaken awake at 2 a.m. "We need to take Mr. Impossible to ER," THO said. "He's dehydrated."

So, I got up, got dressed, woke up the Impertinent One, grabbed a blanket, a towel, and a bowl, and drove to San Marcos and the ER there. That's when we found out it was possibly norovirus, and that we weren't the only ones. There were a lot of people with the same thing there.

Fun, fun, fun.

The Impertinent One, in the meantime, trying to stay awake and to not starve, raided the vending machines and consumed Dr. Pepper, a slice of carrot cake, a Coke, and Doritos. This... made her incredibly hyper and it was exhausting just to look at her. When we got home, the Impossible Son crashed on one couch, THO passed out in our bed, and I went and curled up in the Impertinent One's bed.

I was too tired to process that my teenage daughter was hyper and had nothing to do!!

When I eventually woke up several hours later, I staggered into the dining room and stopped, frowning. Something was missing. The feeling increased as I moved through the kitchen, and then into the living room.

She had cleaned the dining room, the kitchen, and the living room. She did dishes and several loads of laundry and... and... then she... she...

...FOLDED IT ALL AND PUT IT AWAY!!!!

I am still gobsmacked. Still.

Needless to say, our weekend was pretty mellow after that.

Well, Monday, Mrs. O. called and informed me that she had talked to Mrs. K., who had assured her that measures were in place to protect my son. And Mrs. O. was hesitant to transfer my son, but not because of Mrs. K's assurances. She said, "The thing is, we have a group of boys in our fifth grade classes and there is a lot of... ahem... drama going on with them. Normally, this is a problem with the girls, but this year, for some odd reason, it's the boys. And I'm really concerned that if we transfer your son here, we will be taking him from one ... dramatic environment... and dropping him smack-bang into the middle of another dramatic environment with the added bonus that he would be The New Kid. And Mrs. J.... that would be like tying meat around his neck and dropping him in a shark tank."

"I can see that," I said with a sigh, and I do. Great.

I haven't called the other elementary just down the street because that's the school we transferred Miss Impertinent away from when she was being bullied, and the same woman is still principal. She didn't protect Miss Priss, and I don't have a lot of confidence in her protecting Mr. Impossible.

*sigh*

That night, the Impertinent Daughter had a choir concert at the school, and I... wasn't feeling so good. But I went, leaving THO with the Impossible Son, and sat through the junior high choir's unenthusiastic and uninspired droning (no, you can't possibly call that singing) and was relieved when it was the high school choir's turn, because they actually can and do sing, and... drove home after, hoping the rock in my stomach would go away.

Yeah, I spent the night throwing up and ... driving the porcelain bus. Let's put it this way, THO didn't change out of his work clothes until the next afternoon.

So far, the Impertinent One has avoided it. *knocks frantically on wood* This stomach virus is ripping its way through town, and I just hope it doesn't come back for a second visit because... eurgh!!

And then this week, I had a checkup with the endocrinologist. During my last appointment, there was concern that the Lump on my thyroid seemed to be growing, so I was scheduled for an ultrasound, which ended up being rescheduled several times due to circumstances beyond my control (i.e. sick kids). Well, I finally got it done, and when the doctor saw me, he had a pleased smile on his face. The Lump has apparently been reabsorbed, and while they are going to be keeping close tabs on me (I go back in December), they're pretty certain this is just one more part of having Hashimoto's thyroiditis (anybody know Hashimoto? I'm sure he's missing his thyroiditis, and I really wouldn't mind giving it back...).

So... there we are, all caught up. And now, it's time for me to pick the Impossible Son up from school!
auntbijou: (Kirk duh what??)
It's official. This... is the Worst. Summer. EVER.

Want proof??




Yeah, that's a high of 42, a low of 25 today (for those of you across the Pond) and a high of 43, with a balmy low of 25, for tomorrow.

I am NOT leaving this house!!! Well... we might go to Krause Springs tomorrow, which are freezing cold, and I plan to spend the entire time we're there in the water!!! But today, we're supposed to go to a birthday party, and... I'm going to be sitting indoors, in the air conditioning, clutching a glass of ice tea to my chest, wearing the skimpiest clothing I possess!! Because... no, I do not like being overheated, no, no, no. I don't mind getting sweaty, or a little hot, but feeling like I am boiling alive in my own juices? Not so much.

Oh, did I mention? Austin broke a weather record. See, before this week, the longest stretch of triple digit days was 69, set in 1925. We broke that this week with 71 days. So far. The way it's looking right now, we're going to be having triple digits all the way through September!!!

We got a teeny bit of a break on Thursday, because it was cloudy and then it rained, but... it was barely .01 of an inch, which was just enough to cool things down and raise the humidity. It only got up to 88 (31 C) on Thursday, and it actually got cold in the house, because the air conditioner wasn't having to work so hard!!

And the poor Impertinent Daughter! Soccer season isn't until January, but they're working on conditioning and strength training right now, and... the Athletics period at her high school is during the hottest part of the day! They have plenty of access to water, but it's hard on them to work outside in this heat. I feel really sorry for the football team, because they're out there working in full pads and helmets! By the way, they won their game last night, 34 to 9! GO LIONS!!!

*laughs*

And on the medication front, my doctor and my pharmacist are duking it out with the insurance company. *grimaces* You know, if I wasn't already convinced that my acid reflux issues were driving my asthma, I'd be convinced now. I haven't hurt like this since December, and... I thought this was all my asthma's doing. It's the damn reflux. And let me tell you something, Gaviscon doesn't even cut it!

It sucks.

All the idiots who've been protesting universal healthcare because of "Death Panels?" WE ALREADY HAVE THEM

Oh, [profile] tilia_tormentosa asked if my medicine was so very expensive. It's $5 a pill, so a thirty day supply is $150. Which is small beans compared to things like... the pain medication my father was taking for his cancer. That was a little over $26 a pill, which came out to a whopping $800 for a thirty day supply. His insurance refused to cover it, so he and my mother had to pay out of pocket for it, and that depleted their savings rapidly.

Blue Cross Blue Shield, the insurance my husband's company was using before Humana, absorbed $90 of the cost for the Dexilant I was taking, so we only had to pay $60 for it. I have a feeling that if I keep insisting (which I will) on taking the Dexilant that I will be paying the full $150 for it. Whoopee. $150 a months, so I can breathe without pain, so I can eat, so I don't keep coughing my lungs up. Yeah, it's worth it, but man, that's going to be a drain on our resources!!

Oh well, we will see what we will see!

The Last Hurrah...

Thursday, July 14th, 2011 01:49 pm
auntbijou: (Dancing Snape)
In a few minutes, I will leave to run a couple of errands, one of which will be to go to the local theatre to pick up tickets for tonight's midnight showing of "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Pt 2."

As my daughter said this morning, sitting on my bed in shock, "I'm so excited to see it, and yet I'm not because... I'm not ready for it to be over."

We've been following Harry Potter's adventures since she was very, very small. We've laid on the floor with a box of crayons and a huge 18"x 24" tablet of paper in front of us, and drawn Harry, Ron, and Hermione, Hagrid, the blue Ford Anglia flying through the air, Fluffy the three-headed dog, and Professor Dumbledore with pointy toed boots and sparkly purple robes, because Miss Impertinence had gotten glitter sparkle crayons from Aunt Blonde Sister and thought they'd be perfect. We've sewn felt people and made Harry, Snuffles, and Mrs. Weasley with wild curly red hair. We've experimented with making Butterbeer, some of which were awful, and some which were... okay. And when the Impossible Son was born, we tugged him into it, too. We've dressed him up as Harry, and dressed Miss Impertinent as Hermione, and as Luna. We've had Harry Potter birthday cakes and spell battles. We've made up ridiculous spells for very silly things, and we've made a game of looking around when we're in public and spotting people we either think look like the characters in the books, or that we think are secretly witches and wizards slumming it with the Muggles.

In other words, we took the world of Harry Potter and ran with it. And it's been fun!

But... it's sad to see the last movie. Because, according to J. K. Rowling, that's it, there is no more. One can hope she will eventually come around to writing about the next generation of wizards and witches and the challenges they will face, but... that day may be long in coming, or may never come at all.

Still, I'll be leaving to get the tickets. And I'll probably pick up a box of tissues to take with us because... I have a feeling we'll need it.
auntbijou: (Death)
So far, today sucks.

I knew it was going to suck at 6:05 this morning, which is five minutes after I woke up. I realized it when it dawned on me that no, no one had snuck in during the night and driven a railroad spike through the right side of my head, and no, I wasn't just being horribly uncoordinated and yes, my thought processes were indeed as slow as molasses in January.

I woke up with a friggin' migraine.

Then the Husbandly One, on one of his forays outside, discovered I had a flat tire.

*head-desk*

And just to add to the fun, the Impossible Son's ear was hurting to the point of tears.

I was tempted to tell the Impertinent Daughter that she was absolutely forbidden to have anything wrong with her this morning. But I didn't.

THO aired the tire up enough for me to get Miss Impertinent to school, and then to Expert Tire, which has been our go-to for all things car related for a while. And I was really, really hoping it would be a patch job, not a new tire. And I was also hoping that when I called in to the doctor's office, we could get an early appointment so that Mr. Impossible could go to school afterwards, if he was cleared for it.

Yeah. Right.

There was a screw in the tire, the third they'd seen since 7 a.m. and yes, I viewed that with a rather jaundiced eye. Still, it was in a spot that meant no patch job. How convenient. Hello, new tire.

And the only appointment I could get for Mr. Impossible was 12:45, well after the "if you can get him to school before 10 a.m., he won't be counted absent" cut-off. Yeah, even with a doctor's note, they count your kid absent if you bring him in after 10 a.m. The things that drive me nuts about this district don't even need recounting, do they?

So... I'm sitting here, huddled in front of the computer, wishing I could take something for my head, but I can't because... I need to be able to drive, plus Mr. "I Have A Bottomless Pit For A Stomach" is eating everything in sight, and that makes me want to cry because that usually means he's about to have a growth spurt and we just got him new shorts!!

GAAAAAHH!!!!!

Chocolate. I need lots, and lots, and lots of chocolate. Now. That way, when I wake up from the chocolate induced coma, it will be a whole new day!!
auntbijou: made by <lj comm=lvlwings_icons> (Delicious Hot Schmoes!)
Well, what a very intense two weeks it's been! Let's see... the Impertinent Daughter got cleated in the ankle during a game four weeks ago, and has never gotten better, despite rest (okay, as much rest as you can force on an active 14 year old), ice, and ibuprofen. So, I took her to our regular doctor, who immediately benched her and after reviewing x-rays, determined that while there were no stress fractures, she needed to see an orthopedic specialist.

In the meantime, soccer season opened for the recreation league on Saturday, so the Impossible Son had his first game. And it was cold, extremely windy, and a brief shower. Which meant we were cold, wet, and miserable at first. It only rained for maybe 8 minutes, but it managed to soak me from the knees down, and the wind blew it up under the hem of my jeans and completely soaked the ankles of my wool socks, which then seeped down into my shoes. Mr. Impossible was soaked through to his Under Armour cold gear and was shivering, even after I shoved his hoodie on him, yes, I literally shoved it on him because he didn't want to wear it!. The Husbandly One, being such a Killer Macho Dude, chose to acknowledge that it was chilly by wearing jeans instead of shorts, and only wore his light coach's shirt instead of putting on a jacket. Needless to say, he spent a great deal of time either rubbing his hands together, shoving them into his pockets while hunching, or shivering.

*insert eye-roll here*

Mr. Impossible started off as a forward, but seemed to slow down more and more as the first half went on. And the kid the coach had chosen to play goalie had never played it before and had all the attention span of a gnat, so he only noticed a ball coming into the goalbox after it got shot in. So, 5 goals later, she switched out GnatMan with Mr. Impossible.

Of course, after the game, we found out why he wasn't playing like himself. He changed clothes, curled up on the couch to play his DS, then came to me an hour later saying, "Mom, I have a headache." The next thing we knew, he was hotter than a baked potato. I stuck a thermometer in him and whoa, it was 102 F!!!

An hour after that, I was peering into his throat and wondering just how the hell he was breathing, because his tonsils were so swollen, they were almost touching! And everything in there was bright red! Hello, Benadryl!! I was pretty sure at that point our old friend Steve, the Strep Bug, had made yet another visit to our home.

So, Monday rolls around. Monday was the day the Impertinent One was supposed to go to the orthopedic doctor. So, bright and early, I started calling our regular doctor to get Mr. Impossible in because, yes, still sick, with the added attraction of a lovely bumpy rash covering his stomach, groin, and back. WOO-HOO!!!

They couldn't get him in until 1:30.

Miss Priss had an appointment in San Marcos at 3.

Oh, yeah, THAT was fun!

Dose Impossible with Benadryl for itching, run to freshman campus to pick up Impertinent, take both to Dr. W. here in town. Sit in the waiting room, twitching and looking at time, thinking, "I have to be out of here at least by 2:30 to be even close to not being late." Finally get in, they swab his throat, and he's so positive for strep, the tester starts changing the second they put the swab in the medium. So, I called the ortho, Dr. S, told him what was going on and said, "Okay, so... do I bring her in with Impossible in tow, or do we cancel and make another appointment?"

I hear a brief flurry of conversation in the background, and then he says, "Bring her in, but your son needs to have a mask on, and if you've got hand cleaner, use it!"

So that meant a swing by the pharmacy to pick up a small package of masks, and turn in Impossible's prescription, and I love my pharmacy, because they let me grab what I needed and not pay for it until I was back in town.

Dr. S, after an extremely paranoid look at my son, poked and prodded Impertinent's ankle and peered at the x-rays, and confirmed no breaks, no stress fractures... it was a badly sprained ankle that hadn't been allowed to heal, and he gave her a very stern look at that. She's off athletics for four weeks, and she's to go for physical therapy during that time. Seems the ligaments and tendons in her ankle are loose and need to be built back up and if she doesn't do it now, she'll be chronically prone to injuries in that ankle.

*sigh*

When we finally got home, I was ready to collapse. Two nights of little to no sleep, and then all of that? Yeah, I was wiped!

The Impossible Son went back to school today, and I'm hoping like heck the rash he has now is still from strep, and not because he's developed an allergy to the antibiotic he's on. And I'm hoping like heck I didn't get it from him, because I've got a fever and I haven't had a chance to buy new toothbrushes yet.

Oh, and the high school soccer team had their last game last night, which Miss Impertinent could not play in, and it was killing her to have to sit on the bench and have the coach turn to her, about to put her in, and remember that she couldn't play... she was not a happy camper when she came home after.

I need to call the therapy center today to set her up and get her started. And email her coach again about starting her on Pilates.

I think I'll be incredibly stubborn and just refuse to get sick. That'll work, right?

*falls face-first into bed*
auntbijou: (Calcifer)
In all fairness, the Husbandly One did warn me that the New Belgium Ranger India Pale Ale was a fairly strong beer.

I should have interpreted that as, "Auntie, three sips in, you're going to be drunker than a sailor on liberty." Because... I have no alcohol tolerance whatsoever. At all. None. I am the World's Cheapest Date. And right now, I am blotto.

The sad thing is... I only managed to get about 1/4 of the bottle down before I had to stop because the couch was just sooo soft and my head was suddenly too big for my shoulders and wooooo, tipsy!! And I have no idea how I'm managing to type so well, but... wow, still squiffed, yep, that's me!

We invited some friends over to watch the Super Bowl, and, normally, I don't watch the Super Bowl because I'm not so much into football, though I learned about it in self defense, so... mostly, I expected to hang with the kids or something. THO grilled the World's Best Burgers, which were delicious, and then R brougth out the India Pale Ale and Auntie... was lost.

And, I actually started watching the game and started cheering for the Packers, because of course, everyone else was cheering for the Steelers. Sorry, I was an Oilers fan... no, wait, let me rephrase that. I was obligated to be an Oilers fan, and therefore, I cannot in any way, shape, or form cheer for the Steelers. Ever. Okay, there is an exception, but I'm too drunk to remember what it is, so... pbbbbbbttthhh! Anyhow, the Packers won and hey, do you know what the "G" stands for on their logo?

No. It doesn't stand for "Green Bay," because then it would be "GB." No... it stands for "greatness" because apparently, the guy who designed the logo wanted the Packers to be inspired or something like that.

Just thought you ought to know.

Wow, I can babble in type!! Who knew? Or do I mean babble in typing... while typing... oh, whatever.

I probably should go to bed now because really... either I'm swaying, or the computer screen is, and I'm kinda having trouble pulling my thoughts together. So... good night and all that. Woo.
auntbijou: (Calcifer)
Okay, so... maybe shouting myself hoarse through two games in an open air stadium while the temperature drops into the forties and only wearing a hoodie because I left my jacket in the car wasn't the smartest thing I could have done.

Lesson learned? Carry the damn jacket and make the Impossible Son carry the blankets.

Oh, and next time I drive by the farmer's stand, buy the big jar of local honey.

I spent the weekend curled up in bed on the Husbandly One's orders, because I woke up Saturday morning with no voice and a nasty, rattling cough. Yeah, I probably had the bug already, and Friday night just made it worse. Fortunately, THO didn't have his usual trouble keeping me in bed because [personal profile] keiramarcos had a lovely new fic up, and it pretty much kept me engrossed for the entire weekend.

When I finished that, there was Netflix and movies.

And when I get back from seeing the doctor, there will probably be more movies and such until it's time to pick up the kids.

I hate being sick. Of course, this is a good opportunity to do things like finishing up crochet projects I've been putting off, or making more jewelry to sell, or ... writing.

*sigh*

Or I could read that book about Julia Child and Avis DeVoto I'd started reading Saturday, but had to quit because they mentioned food and Saturday, me and food... no, not so much.

Did I already warn you guys about the ultimate nastiness of chicken chili? Smells great, but looks like barf. Avoid at all costs. Do. Not. Go. There.

Anyhow, hopefully, I'll be well in time to go sit in the cold and wet on Friday (since tomorrow's game has been canceled, due to the other school's team not having enough players to make up a junior varsity and varsity team, long story) where the long range forecast says, "It ain't getting out of the forties all day plus SNOW FLURRIES, folks!"

YAYS!!

Texas, folks. This is Texas. Where the weather can't make up its mind. Ya-hooo.

*sigh*
auntbijou: (Kirk duh what??)
Had one of those, "WTF, Brain??" dreams this morning.

I have no idea why my brain induced me to dream about high school soccer, and a distant town with a massive fireworks factory that blew up and threw fire trucks around like toys, or why I was standing in the middle of the soccer field, fending off those fire trucks with my amazing super kinetic powers of doom. Of course, the previous sentence makes about as much sense as my dream did.

Makes me wonder if it's going to be setting the tone for the day.

O_o!

It's probably because I'm somewhat anxious about Christmas. In some ways, I'm looking forward to it, and in other ways, not so much. I love being around my family, most of the time, as long as it's not for too long (two days is about my saturation point). Beyond those two days, I have a very hard time hanging on to my patience. Not that we're going to be there for more than a day, if we can help it. Maybe stay the night, but I don't know. The Husbandly One and the Blonde Sister know better than to put me and Scary Niece in the same house for more than six hours, and definitely not overnight!

I'm dreading another situation like the one I witnessed over Thanksgiving, and this time, I won't be so polite about it. Because seriously, y'all, that totally pissed me off. I know I didn't post much more than to mention some unpleasantness had happened, but you know, if it happens again, I'll do more than "voice my disapproval." I'll call the damn cops.

Yeah. That's probably the reason for the stupid, doesn't make sense, dream of exploding doom.

Ugh. Time to go outside and do some nice, hard, physical work to diffuse my tension. Wreak havoc on the wildly untrimmed hedges and rip out the squirrel planted pecan treelets, and hackberry sprouts in the garden. Woo.

*is amused*

Monday, October 4th, 2010 07:52 am
auntbijou: (Default)
Someone who had "friended" me recently just un-friended me this morning.

I didn't add him or her back, mainly because when I checked his/her LJ, it was filled with photos, some interesting, some not, and on every entry it said, "If you like my photos and you wish to give present for me, you can send some LJ Tokens to me from..." and then had a link the page where you can gift someone with LJ Tokens.

Um... sorry, no. Don't think so. Beside the fact that we had nothing in our interests in common, this... "begging" really annoyed the crap out of me. Granted, this person was posting photos as an... exchange of sorts. Tokens for photos, but... no. Sorry, just... no.

I'm glad they bailed. I was going to give it another week and ban them anyway. Same with someone who added me on Flickr. Not that I don't share that person's interests, but... my kids like to look at my Flickr page, and like to look at the photos my contacts put up (it is so COOL to see what Wil Wheaton posts, I mean... the guy just bought bagfuls and bagfuls of gaming dice at a convention and posted photos of them. TOO COOL!!). I'm not so sure my kids need to see photos of saggy man tits wrapped up in rope, know what I mean?

Heck, I'm not so sure I need to see saggy man tits wrapped up in rope!!

*is squicked*

Why does this make me suddenly want to draw naked Filch tied up shibari style...?

*is doubly squicked*

Okay, I need to head out for my morning walk, before I end up getting back in bed and hiding under the covers!!

Book-squee...

Sunday, August 22nd, 2010 12:48 am
auntbijou: (Devilish)
So, I'm in the middle of Jasper Fforde's Lost in a Good Book, and I come across this:

I bought a ticket, hurried to the check-in and spent ten minutes listening to a litany of pointless antiterrorist questions.

"I don't have a bag," I explained. She looked at me oddly, so I added, "Well, I
did, but you lost it the last time I traveled. In fact, I don't think I've ever had a bag returned to me after tubing."

She thought about this for a moment and then said, "
If you had a bag, and if you had packed it yourself, and if you had not left it unattended, might it contain any of the following?"

She showed me a list of prohibited items and I shook my head.

"Would you like an in-drop meal?"

"What are my choices?"

"Yes or no."

"No."

She looked at the next question on her sheet.

"Who would you prefer to sit next to?"

"Nun or a knitting granny, if that's possible."

"Hmmmm," mused the check-in girl, studying the passenger manifest carefully. "All the nuns, grannies, and intelligent non-amorous males are taken. It's technobore, lawyer, self-pitying drunk, or copiously vomiting baby, I'm afraid."

"Technobore and lawyer, then."


--------- Lost in a Good Book by Jasper Fforde



Char is probably laughing herself silly at me right now, but I am getting seriously hooked. I mean... I actually had to stop reading this book for a short time, because... I got so stressed out when the main character's husband disappeared, and I couldn't help but take it personally!

And I am seriously in love with Pickwick the Dodo, and her "Plock, plock, plock." I want a dodo. I want a herd of dodo's wandering around in the backyard, nibbling on the vegetation and making "plock, plock" noises. Doesn't matter that they're extinct. I want one.

*brief discussion follows with the Husbandly One about the short story, "The Ugly Chickens"*

This is a relief, actually, because I've been in a bit of a reading bind, lately. I had picked up a newish Anne McCaffrey at the library, Catalyst, but... I just couldn't get into it. And the Husbandly One, who is a Vine Voice for Amazon and somewhere in their top 5000 for his reviews, sometimes gets freebies from Amazon if he's willing to review them. So, he gets books, and if he isn't interested, he gets Miss Priss or myself to read them and tell him what we think. Mind, the books we get are galley proofs that still need a lot of editing, and I try to keep that in mind, too, but... this last book THO got me... I couldn't read. It was a Mercedes Lackey book, Much Fall of Blood and I have to say, I had to give up halfway in because, seriously, the last time I was that confused, I was reading a somewhat incoherent fan-fiction. I'm hoping the copy I got was seriously preliminary because the story would leap perspective literally mid-paragraph. One second, I would be reading it from Character A's perspective, and the next, it would skip Characters B, C, D, and J, and leap all the way to Character Q. In the same sentence.

O_o????

It seriously screwed with Auntie's poor brain. And... I was never sure if we were Viking Werewolves, or Mongol vampires, or Viking Mongol Undead, or WHAT... because... well... like I said, let's hope this was just the extremely un-edited version, because O.O if it wasn't!!!

So, it was a very nice relief to get back in to a Thursday Next book.

And by the way, I recently finished My Life in France by Julia Child with Alex Prud'homme, and it was awesome I absolutely loved that book. It makes me wish very much that the movie "Julie & Julia" had been "Julia Child: My Life in France," instead. It would have been a much better movie, seriously.

And in case you're wondering at my sudden volubility, I have lost my voice (probably thanks to the stress of the last few days), and the Husbandly One has made me a very, very strong hot toddy, so Auntie is pleasantly squiffed. Plus, I am very, very tired after a rough day of shopping for school supplies... on the tax-free weekend.

Prolly should have had the hot toddy before going school supply shopping, because seriously... ugh.

Next year, I'll start buying in July, when the supply lists come out, and save myself the hassle. I don't get the grabby, pushy, shove someone out of the way so you can snatch the one out of the 250 other boxesof the same thing that someone else already has their hand on. I don't do touchy-feely; I do ouchy-bleedy.

Oh, yeah, one man in particular learned a very harsh lesson. Do not grab Auntie's bodacious booty and try to explain that it happened because you were making a grab for the glue-sticks, especially if the glue-sticks in question are at eye-level (and Auntie's bodacious booty isn't). Most especially, don't do this in front of your wife.

I am sure he'll regain hearing in that ear... someday.

And now, my dear ones, I am going to pour myself into bed. Goodnight!
auntbijou: (Dancing Snape)
Last year at this time, it was very very hot, and very very dry. The temperatures were in the triple digits, our garden was slowly burning up, and the crops in the fields around town were drying up. The ground was so dry, it was driving the temperatures up, and we were in the epicenter of a catastrophic two year drought.

Today, it is pouring down rain. We have a 70 % chance of rain and thunderstorms, and have already had over three inches of rain. Though the Lower Colorado River Authority warns that we could be back in a mild drought by the middle of summer, right now, things are looking pretty good and very green!

What sort of changes has drought brought into our lives?

My kids have learned not to complain about rainy days. Rainy days are to be celebrated and enjoyed to the fullest! This includes rain dancing, breathless games of soccer or frisbee, running around in the rain and laughing, and then flopping down on the ground panting just to enjoy the feeling of rain pattering on our skin.

We're not doing that today, though, thanks to the thunder and lightning!

It's 8:50 a.m. here, but it's so dark, you'd think it was 5! Part of me wants to go back to bed, but my brain is in "awake" mode, so... *shrugs* So, instead, I went outside and laid out my rain necklace to charge. It was way overdue, poor thing, because instead of being cool and soothing to the touch, it was dry and almost hot! This is the first good thunderstorm we've had in ages, so I'll leave it out for a few hours and let it go. It was made by a dear friend many years ago, and I have kept it carefully in its little bag, only taking it out on special occasions. I like to look at the bag from time to time, because she put so much work into it and it's truly beautiful. Perhaps I'll take pictures of them later to show y'all.

As you can probably tell, I'm in one of my moods. Probably because I was a bit "writing deprived" yesterday. The Husbandly One killed the computer's mouse night before last out of frustration, because the thing was seriously on the fritz. It was a wired mouse, and the wiring had frayed where it connects to the mouse, and this made the use of it erratic at best. With no mouse, the Mac was useless, and though I have a laptop, I don't do any writing on it that I can't save to a USB drive (which are all full) because we take the laptop with us when we go on trips.

The kids kept me busy and distracted, but... oh, how I wanted to write!!

We now have a Magic Mouse, which happies me greatly! No more wire, no more struggling to keep the wire from getting caught in the tray or the keyboard shelf, or away from the cats, or the kids... I love my Magic Mouse!! Hee!!

That's all for now. I mean, it's been a busy few days, but for now, I want to sit back and contemplate the things I'm working on, and see about writing something I can post maybe later in the week. I also owe someone a drabble.

*picks up Coke and leans back to look out the window at the rain while pondering stories*
auntbijou: (Blessed Bee)
The Impertinent Daughter has a friend, we'll call him Toast Boy. Well... actually, I think she and her friends call him "Turtle" so... perhaps I should call him that, too. Not because he is turtle-like in anyway, but he loves turtles. And the other important thing for you to know is that he is obsessed with toast.

I guess there are worse things to be obsessed with!

Anyhow, because they are good friends, and rather silly together, when Miss Priss and I were looking through the many very, very cute wearables on shanalogic.com and found this very, very cute toast scarf, she immediately said, "Oh, Turtle would loooove one of those! How much is that?"

I said, startled, "You want to buy this??"

"It would be perfect for him, Mum! He's got this thing with toast..."

So I looked at the price and promptly inhaled my tongue.

A few hearty slaps of the back later, the Impertinent One said, "Can't you make that? I mean, it's crochet, right? You can crochet that... right?"

And here is the result...

Toaster Scarf

As you can see, she is as pleased as Punch with that scarf! And because she's giving it to a friend who happens to be a boy, rather than a boyfriend, we decided to make the butter pats square rather than heart-shaped. I think it turned out rather well, considering I had to make up the pattern myself!

Evidently, it's rather tasty, too...

Tasty...

I told her that when she gives it to him, she should ask him, "So, are we going to be friends for life or what?" And if he says yes, she should hold it out solemnly across her hands and say something like, "Then I present you with the order of the Toasty Scarf!" and drape it around his neck!

Hey, for all the work I put into it, completing it within a month, I figure some over-the-top dramatic gesture should go with it!! Would have finished it sooner if I hadn't had to undo it, and redo it until I figured out the stitches, then had more than a few minutes of uninterrupted time to work on it!! As it is, I hope she remembers to tell me how he reacted when he got it! I do know that the very idea of me making it for him (because her best friend let it slip, not knowing he was behind them when she asked about it) was enough for him to come up to me two weeks ago and introduce himself to me, squeaky voice and terror-stricken eyes and all!!

Seriously... I'm not that scary... am I??

Anyway, after telling me who he was, and why he was shaking my hand with damp palms, he made a few incoherent statements that might have been about the Impertinent Daughter's comics and drawings (I'm sure her name, comics, and cracking up were in there somewhere), he blurted something about being happy to meet me, and disappeared rapidly.

I wonder what it will be like when a boy she's dating introduces himself to me?

*dies laughing*

Anyhow, I'm done, and I'm glad! And glad it's going to Turtle, who will hopefully be very happy with it!

May 2020

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