Auntie vs the Killer Psycho Bird from Hell

[auntbijou]

Okay, so there I was, minding my own business, doin' my laps around the track.  And yes, Alex, I went earlier than yesterday so I would avoid Mr. Annoyingly Oblivious Talkative Guy, and successfully missed him.  Darn, I'm sooooo disappointed (can you hear the sarcasm dripping off my voice?).

Anyway, I was doing my laps, and was into the second one, and coming up to a curve next to the highway where there is a half grown oak tree.  I had my iPod on, listening to this really good song by a group called Goldroom that I've taken a liking to when all of a sudden, something slams into my hat.  I looked up, didn't see anything, looked down, didn't see anything, so I kept moving.  It didn't hurt so much as it just startled me.  So, I'm humming along, come around for my third lap, get to the turn, and it happens again.  This time, I heard an angry squawk along with the hit.  I looked up and got a sudden understanding what an anti-aircraft gunner feels like when a plane is screaming down at him, because a mockingbird was diving at me, and I was literally staring right up into its gullet, because it had its mouth wide open, screaming a challenge at me.  No, I didn't stick around, I got busy and got moving.  As soon as I was out of range, it stopped diving at me.  This was a surprise, because I didn't think it was time to for the mockingbirds to start selecting nesting sites yet, though I dunno, maybe this bird just wants to get ahead of the others and find a really good spot.  

He or she is bound to be frustrated, because that's a public track, and lots of people use it at all hours of the day, all the way up until late evening.  

I did three more laps, and found myself hurrying around that corner, because as soon as I made the curve, that damn bird would start squawking and diving at me, pecking at me and grabbing my hair.  OUCH!!!!  The last time, it hit me so hard, I nearly star-fished on the track, and only caught myself just before I hit the gravel, managing to scramble away before it could do any damage.    

Well, I was only going to do six laps anyway.  

When I walked to my car, I saw Mr. Annoyingly Oblivious Talkative Guy stretching and getting ready for his run, and in the interests of being neighborly, I stopped by him and said, "Be careful around that far turn where the oak tree is.  There's a very defensive mockingbird there, and he's divebombing to protect his tree."

He looked up, then looked toward the tree.  "I don't see a mockingbird."

"Trust me, there's a mockingbird there." 

"I don't think it'll be a problem.  Birds are generally scared of people."

I nodded and said, "Whatever," and went to my car.  And yes, I didn't leave right away.  I stretched, drank my water, and waited.  And sure enough, when Mr. Annoying got to that corner, that bird went for him with a vengeance!!!  It could not have been any more impressive, not if that damn bird had had like... a spear and magic helmet!!  It knocked his hat off, and it sent his hair flying, and he started yelling and waving his arms over his head, crouching down, and I sat in my car and laughed myself silly.  Yes, there is divine justice in this world!

Thing is, what do I do about tomorrow?  Carry an umbrella?  A red cape?  Flamethrower?  Any suggestions, Vicki?  After all, from Mr. Killer Psycho Mockingbird's point of view, I'M the intruder.

Guess the flamethrower would get me frowned on in this town, huh?